ratpag 03-S-02 “The One Where They Mail it In”

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You probably thought ratpag was full of fresh ideas when we made our triumphant return some 4 – 7 days ago.  What a silly thought.  Today we present the second post of our third phase in this wacky ratpag experiment.  Take it away, New Jersey correspondent…

Hello readers!  Oh my!  You must be wondering “where has your New Jersey correspondent been the past few months?”  Did he take New Jersey Transit down to the Jersey Shore?  Or is he stuck on a train?  Maybe he’s waiting for the East Side Access Project to be finished.  Perhaps he is raising money to finance train tickets given the upcoming fare hikes.  Maybe he got addicted to weed!

Well, don’t worry – he’s not doing any of that!  He’s looking out for you, ratpag’s hardcore readers, by compiling rail and transit news as well as analyzing all of the candidates for the upcoming 2016 presidential election.  And, to jump on the bandwagon, he would like to inform you, the uniformed, ignorant reader, about DONALD TRUMP.

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Fun Fact:  Did you know the “J” in Donald J. Trump stands for Jor-El, his biological father (husband of Lara, a leading scientist)?  

DONALD TRUMP is a successful businessman from NEW YORK CITY, home of the eastern side of the “most important rail project in the U.S.”  And he says he owns at least $10 billion worth of assets!  DONALD TRUMP’S $10 billion could pay for this $1 million investment 10,000 times over.  U.S. railroads may have recently logged the highest intermodal volume for a week but DONALD TRUMP would be the richest president ever – EVER!

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Fun Fact:  Did you know the “J” in Donald J. Trump stands for “Jacopo” and that “The Donald” grew up in Costa Rica?

Vermont wants to improve rail service?  Well, New Hampshire has the first primary and DONALD J. TRUMP might win it!

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Fun Fact:  Did you know the “J” in Donald J. Trump doesn’t actually stand for anything at all.  Once he reached age 18, Mr. Trump decided to make his middle name “Jay” so as to avoid confusion on DMV renewal applications.

Well, that’s enough fun for one day.  We look forward to seeing Donald Trump’s infrastructure improvement plan.  Or anyone else’s infrastructure improvement plan.  We’re sure all of the candidates are hard at work solving such important problems right now!

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